Wednesday, January 25, 2012

A letter to your crush

I always go for the bad boys. I knew you were alll wrong from the getup. My guts good. But still here I am. Thinking that maybe one day you'll give me a chance. Even though by now I'm so invested into other types of relationships I would only wind up self destructing if you ever gave me the chance. And you would wind up hurting me anyways. But here's the deal friendster. I wish you happiness and clarity. I pray that you will find this. You are someone who has brought so much happiness to my life, have built me up when I needed it. Comforted me through words. I hope that I can manage to do the same for you. I pray that I can be the friend that you need me to be. Right now, you are everything I need you to be. You bring me some very fun, crazy times that I willl never have with anyone else. Mostly just because I do not have the balls to admit to another human being that I Like the things that you have shown me. But also because, this will just be our time. And I hope that It doesn't come to a crashing ugly end. I hope that when one of us finds someone we want to be with that we will just go our seperate ways. 
But I also hope that I never lose you. You mean a lot to me. 
I don't think you realize exactly how much. 
You made a heart breaking, soul shattering moment easier. 
I walked away from something and you made it minimally heartbreaking. I still have my soul. And for that I thank you. It wasn't just because you are a distraction from the pain. It's because you taught me that it is okay to laugh. That it really does heal the pain. I hope you know how awesome of a person you are and how much I love you. 

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